Freedom Begins in the Mirror

Every July, we celebrate freedom.

We celebrate courage. Sacrifice. Independence.

But there is another kind of freedom that rarely gets fireworks.

It is the freedom that begins when we stop blaming and start owning.

Many leaders spend years waiting for freedom to arrive. They wait for a better boss, a healthier culture, a more supportive team, a different economy, a new opportunity, or simply better circumstances.

Yet some of the freest people I know are not living in ideal circumstances.

And some of the most trapped people I know possess enormous resources, influence, and opportunity.

Why?

Because freedom is rarely found in circumstances. It is often found in choices.

Leadership eventually teaches us an uncomfortable truth: we cannot control most of what happens around us. We cannot control organizational politics, difficult coworkers, changing markets, family history, economic downturns, or the decisions of other people.

As leadership author Mary Abbajay writes, “You can’t change the culture of your organization. You can only change how you navigate and respond to it.”

That may sound limiting. In reality, it is profoundly liberating.

Because the moment we stop trying to control everything outside ourselves, we reclaim responsibility for the one thing we can lead: ourselves.

Viktor Frankl, who survived Nazi concentration camps, famously observed:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

That space is where agency lives. It’s where leadership lives.

Interestingly, research consistently suggests that leaders who exercise agency in one area of life often do so in others as well.

Researchers studying major S&P CEOs found that leaders who consistently invested in their physical health often led organizations that performed better under pressure. Physical fitness appears to strengthen resilience, cognitive performance, and stress management—but it may also reflect something deeper: the habit of exercising agency and intentionally stewarding one’s own growth. (Limbach & Sonnenburg, 2015)

Exercise itself also improves executive functioning, attention, cognitive flexibility, and stress regulation—the very capacities leaders depend upon every day. (Mandolesi et al., 2018)

Now, this does not mean every successful leader is thin, nor does it suggest that body size determines leadership ability.

But it does raise an interesting question.

Chicken or egg?

Do successful leaders become more intentional because they gain influence?

Or do people who consistently practice agency—who make difficult choices, delay gratification, pursue growth, and lead themselves well—eventually become the kinds of people trusted with greater responsibility?

I suspect it is both.

Leadership is not simply what we do at work. It is how we steward our entire lives.

People who believe they have meaningful choices tend to pursue growth in multiple areas. They apologize. They learn. They exercise. They forgive. They ask for help. They set boundaries. They seek healing. They start again.

Not perfectly.

Persistently.

This is not about blaming ourselves for every wound we carry. Many of us have experienced pain, trauma, injustice, and losses we did not choose.

But while we may not be responsible for every wound, we are responsible for what happens next.

Every comeback begins there.

Every healthy culture begins there.

Every meaningful freedom begins there.

Freedom is not the absence of responsibility.

Freedom is the opportunity to choose wisely.

And some of the greatest joy in life comes when we stop waiting for rescue and discover that, by God’s grace, we have been given far more agency than we realized.

What is one area of your life where greater ownership might lead to greater freedom?

Limbach, P., & Sonnenburg, F. (2015). Does CEO fitness matter? (CFR Working Paper No. 14-12). Centre for Financial Research, University of Cologne. https://ideas.repec.org/p/zbw/cfrwps/1412r3.html

Mandolesi, L., Polverino, A., Montuori, S., Foti, F., Ferraioli, G., Sorrentino, P., & Sorrentino, G. (2018). Effects of physical exercise on cognitive functioning and wellbeing: Biological and psychological benefits. Frontiers in Psychology, 9, Article 509. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.00509 

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