The Accountability Gap: Why Tolerating Toxicity Breaks Everything

Michael Troxell
Sep 3
4 min read

There’s an old leadership adage that cuts straight to the heart of culture failure: “What you permit, you promote.”

It’s not just true—it’s inevitable. When someone behaves in a way that harms the team, the mission, or the values, and that behavior is tolerated, it gets interpreted as acceptable. Not by everyone, but by enough people that your standard starts to crumble. Quietly at first. And then… loudly, destructively.

Maya Angelou said, “When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.” But for some reason—fear of confrontation, misplaced grace, or just plain wishful thinking—we keep giving people a second, third, fourth time to do damage. We wait too long to confront, too long to protect the innocent, too long to lead. And in that delay, the good people lose heart.

Scripture says it just as clearly. Ecclesiastes 8:11 (NLT) reads, “When a crime is not punished quickly, people feel it is safe to do wrong.”

Or, paraphrased for today’s world: “When consequences are delayed or denied, the toxic learn they are untouchable—and the healthy learn they are unprotected.”

When Accountability is Absent, Everyone Pays

Accountability isn’t about punishment—it’s about protection. It ensures alignment, builds trust, and maintains unity. Without it, systems fracture. Culture decays. Talented people leave. And what’s left behind? A hollow structure filled with distrust, dysfunction, and fear.

Whether it’s a boardroom, a classroom, a marriage, or a ministry—accountability is the glue that holds safety and mission together. Remove it, and you create:

Chaos: Because no one knows the real rules.
Injustice: Because the wrong people get protected.
Resentment: Because the right people get disrespected.
Instability: Because no one knows who or what will be allowed next.
Silence: Because the wise go quiet to protect themselves.
Attrition: Because eventually, the good ones walk away.

And here’s the hard truth: when the wrongdoer is protected, the whole community is betrayed. Especially in leadership, accountability is more than a management tool—it’s a moral obligation. Your silence signals where your loyalty lies. If you don’t hold someone accountable, you’re telling your team that their wellbeing matters less than keeping one person comfortable.

Modern Examples That Hit Home

Business

Sometimes, accountability is sidestepped through manipulation—not just power. Toxic employees may make false accusations of racism, sexism, ageism, or other hot-button issues—not because they’ve truly been victimized, but because they know those words carry weight and will scare leaders into silence. When false claims are used as shields, they not only harm the team—they also cheapen the very real experiences of others who have suffered legitimate injustice. In the end, justice is twisted: the toxic are protected, the innocent are ignored, and the leaders who try to act with integrity are often punished—either socially or professionally.

Religion

I personally watched an institution I once worked for slowly unravel because they protected and promoted the wrong people—those making poor ethical and leadership choices—while sidelining or punishing those who were actually doing the hard, honest work to move the organization forward. Eventually, I had to walk away. I couldn’t keep participating in a system that punished integrity and rewarded dysfunction. Leaving it was painful, but I’m better for it. And that experience is what fuels my passion for helping leaders choose better.

Sports

When I was in sixth grade, I volunteered as the water boy for the eighth grade football team. I was excited—until our first game. It was a blowout loss, and afterward, the coach kept us locked in the locker room and screamed at all of us—players and support staff—for almost an hour. I didn’t even play, and I was still berated as if I had failed the team. That moment taught me something I never forgot: leadership without accountability for the leader becomes abuse. I resigned immediately, and a number of star players quit soon after. The team never recovered that season.

What Can Leaders Do?

If you’re in any position of leadership—whether in business, education, ministry, sports, government, or your home—accountability starts with you. Here’s how to build it in:

Confront Early, Kindly, and Clearly. Accountability doesn’t have to be harsh. But it does have to be timely and truthful.
Be Consistent. Don’t create one set of rules for high performers and another for everyone else.
Protect the Innocent, Not the Offender. Loyalty belongs to the mission and the people being harmed—not the person causing harm.
Own Your Misses. When you’ve failed to hold someone accountable, admit it. Model what accountability looks like.
Define the Culture—And Defend It. Don’t just hang your values on the wall. Live them. Enforce them. Let them shape who stays and who goes.